What's Your Definition Of Success In Today's Mediocre World

By Joshua Oluehi

 Today we define success by publicity and bank accounts. But that's not really success at all. Don't believe the hype. Success is ephemeral. You have to define it yourself.  - CHRIS NOTH

Success is subjective, but what success means to me will hugely differ from what it means to other people. In this article I am not going to talk about success as a specific and definable thing that anyone can achieve by following a couple of steps. Rather this will be more about what success really is NOT for most people, although it is the currently accepted paradigms of what true success looks like.

• According to certain television and digital media commercials, success means consuming a premium brand of beer that costs a dime or so more per bottle.

• Car manufacturers would have you believe that success entails owning their particular make of vehicles

• Credit-card companies would have you believe success means owning their specific piece of plastic.

• Cell-phone companies would have you believe success means owning their most expensive brands of mobile devices.

• Some musicians today would have you believe success means spending a fortune on cars, chains, shoes, club houses while bedding every handsome/beautiful human you come across on the street.

Most People today especially youths are doggedly pursuing this rather bizarre notion of success. They are focusing more on other people's visions of success and less on success that resonates with their persona. What’s particularly unsettling is that many people today believe that they don't have to settle for anything but the shiniest, most glamorous and fastest track.

For example, a record numbers of young people (talented or not), are flocking to music studios primarily because, for the individual, it is not only a societal norm nowadays (a way to get all the attention and money), but also a way to feign doing something for their future. I dare to ask how many continue this adventure 10, 15 years on especially when it doesn't bring the expected results. Of course this excludes those who really have a thing for music because these individuals irrespective of getting attention and money from their art, draw the strength to go on for years from their inner sense of fulfillment and love of what they do.

Yes, the world is revolving and as humans we have to change or adapt to the current but this should not be done at our own detriment of our present and future selves. People are locking themselves into careers that will define and also limit their activities and happiness for virtually the rest of their lives because they succumb to societal pressures to appear a certain way or pursue certain things denoted by worldly reward, rather than by a firmness of will and purpose.

Success isn’t all about what others can see externally. Because you look happy and successful externally doesn’t mean you are also happy and successful internally. On the other hand, just because other people can’t see your success, doesn’t mean you are not successful. Weighing success and happiness externally and internally, you would agree with me that it is being successful and happy internally that matters.

 

HOW IT ALL GETS STARTED 

 

Schooling 

It all starts with schooling, I am not against schooling as it definitely expands our knowledge bank. The problem is it provides a very limited and one dimensional view of our world. It sets you on a trajectory of conformity that really does not suit everyone. In schools curriculum dictates what the teacher says and ultimately you do what they say. Imagine sitting in a classroom room for practically the whole day, listening in silence to a teacher talking about what sometimes you have absolutely no interest in. From this stage, pupils are discouraged from exercising their creative abilities and taught that success means vomiting on paper (exams) exactly what their teacher has repeated to them overtime.

 

Higher Education

Higher education is a little different from traditional schooling because you can actually choose the subject in which you would like to specialize in. I am also not saying that higher education is entirely a bad idea, it is infact great. The problem with higher education is the promise  of  “If you do well now, you can worry less later.”

Higher education used to guarantee you a job for life, now some people come out of higher education, and are absolutely clueless plus they cannot get a good job offer. Schools have gone on to design the world to enslave the brightest prospects by subjecting to a view of success that entails working for long hours everyday while being rewarded with fat salaries and huge bonuses (societal success).

“An Oxford degree or owning a successful business or a perfect looking body does NOT guarantee inner-happiness, peace of mind, self-love, and a loving relationship.” ― Maddy Malhotra

“The singular difference between success and true success is those who achieved true success did not pursue success, they were driven by it. They were those who followed their strengths, they were those who spent each heartbeat to proffer solutions to humanity’s problems, they were those who lived a highly simple and effective life.” ― Sesan Kareem

 

Work

I personally experience 'day-mares' whenever I think about sitting behind a desk for long periods trying to achieve goals, objectives and dreams set out by someone else. I feel it stifles my creativity and my sense of fulfillment. Work obviously differs from person to person, but the common corporate culture is that of climbing the ladder, working hard and trying to get to a higher position in your workplace. The implication is that if you can get so far, you will become successful.

The story of “if you do well now, you can worry less later.” continues here. They say you do the hard-work now, save a lot money and invest in these pension schemes so you can rest when you get older. But its not always so, health problems occur as a result of extreme stress, your kids are going to eat into those savings and the economy is not going to become very favorable into the foreseeable future. 
 

HOW IT ALL ENDS

Today’s engineers and accountants, for example, have invested so much in their
training that only a tiny percentage of them will ever opt out of their early
chosen fields to pursue their truest passion career paths, if it be different. And
so they forego what should have made them truly happy i.e what resonates with their own person in pursuit of what is supposedly the logical, safe or clear path to success prescribed by society.
 
The effect of making decisions based on these hothouse notions of success
is that fewer people are taking on the sublime and rewarding challenges of the arts and sciences. Few people are reaching their full potential, making as much of their minds and talents as they can. Few people are asking the right questions, the questions that engage the heart and creative mind.

It’s sad that some people (writers, artists, musicians and entrepreneurs) seem to realize this very late in life. The success that people see, the one that everyone craves for, the one that’s the brightest and trendiest is often tempered with some kind of happiness and sense of fulfillment that comes from within.  Meaningful success and happiness is determined not by what you have achieved (or not achieved) in life, but by the truthfulness of your efforts and how you truly feel within. Material successes and obvious privileges might be desirable, but ultimately what matters more is its significance. If you continue to base all your decisions on today's hothouse notions of ambition and success, you will be limiting yourself severely and losing more than you know. Be unique. Be confident. Be true to yourself. If you cannot do something you love in your work, do something you love outside of your work, learn to find significance in this moment and don’t expect a change in your external circumstances to bring you happiness. Getting a promotion can obviously be a great thing, but if you are chasing it with the intention of your life being better as a result, you will unlikely find any satisfaction when you reach such destination.

“Your true success in life begins only when you make the commitment to become excellent at what resonates with you.”

“What’s money? A man is a success if he gets up in the morning and goes to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do.” —Bob Dylan

“Success comes from knowing that you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.” —John Wooden

  

Written by: Joshua Oluehi

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